Sunday, August 30, 2009

c h e r i s h

~

C h e r r i e s . . C h e r i s h . . C h e e r f u l . .

~

How I love those lovely round cherries! I've always had good memories with this yummy reddish juicy fruit.. One of the most beautiful things about this sweet fruit, is that it has a smooth/hard seed inside of it.. Smooth & hard, have you noticed that? I wish I can learn how to be smoothly hard from the inside.. It doesn't, by any means, mean that I'll have a rough/hard exterior, on the contrary, if you noticed, a cherry's flesh is always tender! Only 'cuz of it's seed, it's beautifully held together..

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Cherishing what we have can always save us from the evil of looking for what we don't have.. I wish we can be able of only cherishing & not whining.. I wish..

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

If we do that, we'll always be cheerful & spread good spirits to all that surrounds us :) Everything will be rotated around joy; & we'll find great pleasure all through good/bad times :)

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

I wish.. I wish dad could just come through the door now carrying a box full of cherries like he always used to with that charming kind smile of his...... Missing you daddy <3

Friday, August 28, 2009

~ Hanging On By A Thread ~

~

What can I say.. It's what all of us get to at certain points in our lives.. Hanging on by a thread, and not knowing what the next moment has in store for us.. Now, not knowing is veeeeeeeery common, 'cuz it's a fact of our lives here, The Unseen.. And that thread, differs from one person to another from the outside.. But you know what I've found out? It's all relatively THE VERY SAME from the inside! It's a thread that connects you to The One Who Has your soul in His Hands.. Whatever name you give that thread, trust me, IT'S THE SAME!

~

"Desperate for changing

Starving for truth

I'm closer to where I started

I'm chasing after you

I'm falling even more in love with you

Letting go of all I've held onto

I'm standing here until you make me move

I'm hanging by a moment here with you

Forgetting all I'm lacking

Completely incomplete

I'll take your invitation

You take all of me

I'm falling even more in love with you

Letting go of all I've held onto

I'm standing here until you make me move

I'm hanging by a moment here with you

I'm living for the only thing I know

I'm running and not quite sure where to go

And I don't know what I'm diving into

Just hanging by a moment here with you

There's nothing else to lose

There's nothing else to find

There's nothing in the world

That can change my mind

There is nothing else

There is nothing else

There is nothing else"

~ By Lifehouse ~

Al Khaliq :)

Silent Sunlight :)

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

L i g h t U p

~

Loving one another for no earthly cause is a very rare commodity nowadays :( When that is found, you just wanna hold on to it & never let go.. However, it's hard at most times..

I've been learning new things recently from some real nice people & whenever that happens, I try to jot everything down in my heart so that I don't lose it.. I've never been much of a concentrating student as much as I've been counting on the heartfelt knowledge..

Anyways, the most amazing knowledge that successfully passes unto others always happens when: 1. The student really wants to leeeeeeearn! 2. The teacher really wants to teeeeeeeach! When these two items take place, miracles come to life!

I wanna take this opportunItalicity to thank every single person I met whom have added something beautiful that made me the person I am today :) Whether alive or dead, may Allah grant them eternal peace & everlasting light that saves them from the darkness here & in the after-life; just as they've saved me from this world's darkness & the one after it inshaAllah, Ameeeeen:)

Before I go, there's this new related Baba Ali video that reminds us not to forget important things in the process of passing on one's knowledge, here :)

~

THANK YOU :)

Monday, August 24, 2009

~ b i r d i e s ~

~

We always feel good when giving.. It's an inborn instinctive gift that God Has granted us to be able to enjoy it while doing it (another gift from amongst the many others:) ).. Some lose this gift by not knowing-how/wanting to use it.. Gracefully, I come from a family that truly knows how to use this gift, & hopefully, I'd die someday while using it as beautifully as they do.. Hopefully..

I talked earlier about mama's feeding-birds-balcony-corner.. And I swear, when their (birds') water or food runs out, they CALL OUT FOR HER!!!!

Granny is here now :) & as you know, it's very hot out here in the gulf at summer time.. The salty waters give us a lotta hard time breathing, but I love it, 'cuz it's a part of being home.. Anyways, I saw granny doing one of the most beautiful things minutes ago! She asked me to go get her the water bowl that the birds drink from.. I went out, checked it & told her, "No granny, it's still half full, we don't need to re-fill it now.." She said, "Just get it..".. I got it & to my surprise, I found her getting an ice cube & adding it to the water to cool it down for the birdies!!!!!!!!!!!

Seeing all this beauty around me shocks me when seeing others stepping on the weaker-others in the real scary world out there.. Hunger, ignorance, illness, injustice & what not.. I wish people would get in touch with their inner-selves & try a li'l harder to feel others & not only themselves.. I wish I/you would never forget teta's soft birdie gesture & practice it on our brothers & sisters in humanity, amen :)

Sunday, August 23, 2009

I LOVE RAMADAN :)

(picture's source)

~

I wanted to share all those crazy ramadanic/masjid moments that make you wanna fly through the masjid's large window to a much better atmosphere.. I wanted to talk about all those kids' cries, women's whispers/fights, unbelievable ignorance & extreme love of Allah that a lotta us have in common.. I wanted to talk about the different languages/accents you hear, smells you have to digest & looks you have to get.. And I so wanted to talk about the not-so-sweet advices that every single soul out there wanna give!

However, I can never do that, since my dear sister Organica did so in the most beautiful way, as always.. Please do enjoy her thoughts on Taraweeh Prayers here :D

And I can't leave you without my favourite ramadanic video ever: Baba Ali's :D Enjoy!

Saturday, August 22, 2009

R a m a d a n 1 4 3 0 :)

~

"That's the way that the world goes 'round.

You're up one day and the next you're down.

It's half an inch of water and you think you're gonna drown.

That's the way that the world goes 'round."

~ By John Prine ~

~

So, the days pass, and we walk by.. Rarely do we pause & look inside.. However, there are special times that are granted to each & every one of us, where purity of thought reaches its peak & purity of intention & deed follows.. And one of those very personally special times is R A M A D A N :) It's not just the fasting that tastes different in Ramadan (than other days), it's everything.. The whole masjids' shaking rhythms, the footsteps dying for forgiveness, the cries longing for acceptance & the never ending pleads for a better life..

1430, came to me, with a beautiful gift & found me with a sad loss.. I hope I can take all I can from it & my prayers would be more than memorized words that are said heartlessly.. Hope I'll feel every move I make & every breath I take on His Holy Way.. Hope I learn more about His Timeless Love & reflect all of The Light that brightens my days & nights.. Hope those blessed nights would bring out the best of me, to me & to the universe.. Amen :)

You know, everyday is a brand new one, coming with a new face, new dream, new wish & a new need.. Happy ones are those who wake up & wipe the sleep from their eyes while knowing what to want & how to get it from this new day, while keeping that warm lovely smile to help them go through it all :)

~

May all our days be blessed,

& all our hearts get rest..

For those nights go fast,

& their days end with fast..

Thirty days, thirty fast breakers,

So don't forget to ask your Creator..

To bless our hearts with true eternal love,

For it takes more than a heavy stomach stuff..

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

~ z a m a a n ~

~

I was reading Surat Al-Anfal (The Spoils Of War), Chapter 8 in The Qur'an today.. And I read this verse as if I've never read or heard it before.. Here:

"He has reconciled the hearts (of the believers). Had you spent all the money on earth, you could not reconcile their hearts. But GOD did reconcile them. He is Almighty, Most Wise." ~ 8:63

How amazingly true! No matter how hard you try to like/dislike someone, it'll never work.. What works is controlling your actions, but not you heart! One of the secrets of the heart is that it's sooooo much like it's beats.. Up & down according to its own wish, not yours..

However, I wonder where the love of one's kins comes from.. Like your sister/grandpa/uncle & so forth.. It comes in with your birth like, a package.. What kills me is how some people try to fight gravity & kill those birth given packages that come for free! They're long lasting & so supportive to one's heart all throughout the years..

Please, please, please oh brother & sister, don't fight gravity, it will only 'cuz you pain more than any joy! Trust me!

~

~

A CONFESSION: I think I'm missing that old little girl in me! I feel like turning into a more mature being enduring all new feelings and plans that will subsequently turn me into a different sara.. I hope this new me will be a lighter one with bigger wings that can take me higher & higher, "to a place where blind men see..".. Amen! I remember when I was younger, my brother & I used to play this "flying" game that did actually give us that feeling that we were longing for, even though it was just in our rooms! We used to stand on our beds, cloak ourselves with our blankets, & together, in the same moment, we'd jump from one bed to another (with our eyes closed at times) :) Right there & then, nothing, ABSOLUTELY NOTHING, in the world mattered as much as that moment did!

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

"Would you tell me a story, please?"

~

FROM THE MOVIE: SEVEN POUNDS:

~

Ben: Hello?

Emily: Ben? Hi, I'm sorry to call so late.

Ben: Did...? Did someone from the IRS contact you?

Emily: No. I just... I was having trouble breathing after I took Duke for a walk, and I fainted. An ambulance had to take me to the hospital. I'm so sorry. I don't know why I even called you. I'm sorry. It's just that I have your card with me, and... Ben? Are you still there?

Ben: Yes.

Emily: Do you ever think about dying, Ben?

Ben: Every now and again.

Emily: My face is bluish. It's not exactly a good sign.

Ben: You should try to rest. Just... Why don't you see if you can get some sleep?

Emily: I like talking to you.

Ben: I like talking to you too.

Emily: Would you tell me a story, please?

Ben: Okay. All right. Once upon a time...... there was a little boy named...

Emily: Oh, lucky me, you just got it on reserve like that. Okay. Let me guess. His name was Ben.

Ben: No, actually, this little boy's name is Tim.

Emily: I like the name Tim. Go on.

Ben: Tim's little brother was always pestering Tim......to make him paper airplanes, because he was really good at it. But Tim had much bigger dreams than that.

Emily: Okay. Then what happened?

Ben: One day, Tim went out to the backyard......and he put leaves and taped branches to his arms......and started climbing the big oak tree. His little brother said, "Tim, you can't fly." And he said, "Yeah? You just watch." He got all the way to the top and jumped.

Emily: How tall was this tree?

Ben: It was... It was pretty tall. He broke his arm.

Emily: Oh, my God... This is a horrible story.

Ben: Oh, no, no. It gets better. From that experience, Tim realized that he wanted to fly. So he dedicated his life to making spaceships.

Emily: I thought you said this was a good story.

Ben: Oh, well... Yeah, that is......until the dragons showed up.

Emily: Oh, okay, see, now it's getting better. I like dragons. Especially dragons in space.

Ben: Yes, and these were fire-breathing space dragons...... with really bad attitudes.

Emily: I see.

Ben: I have an idea. Why don't you try to fall asleep...... and when you do, I'll just hang up.

Emily: Okay. Ben?

Ben: Yes.

Emily: Thank you for listening. And for talking.

Ben: Try to fall asleep.

Emily: Good night, Ben.

Ben: Good night, Emily. Emily? Emily?

mon roche..

(picture's source)

~

I hold on to so many things in my life & wrap all my fears, joys, dreams & plans around them.. Small little things really, but to me, they represent me.. My state.. My chaos.. My very inner self.. With them, I feel whole.. I feel like no matter how strong that tide will be, I'll be safe & sound..

But time, time is always stronger than tide.. It's slow, yet more powerful than any other storm.. It's loud, but never promises, instead, turns its back on you fearlessly, with nothing to lose! And right there & then, it's you you're left with.. Just you & your self.. Your very fragile self.. And only you can save yourself & find a strong rock to hold on to, or let time take you up & down with it & then, you end up alone, trembling with fear, until your very last breath..

Now some give up and say: "I couldn't find the rock..".. Well, I know its hard to find a strong one.. One that has been there for hundreds of years, strong enough to support you, & big enough to hold your fears down & strengthen you.. But I swear to you, every single soul born/or-will-come-to-life, had/will-have a rock especially existing for them.. And it shows up in everyone's life & calls on to them; to hold on to.. But it's us who fail to see really.. It's a result of either: -not wanting to see OR -not wanting to see.. It's never 'cuz of "not seeing".. Every one of us has been granted an insight larger than life itself.. An insight that can grow with time or die.. Die because of a killer that couldn't wait a little more and "see" a little harder! And oh my, if only they can sentence all those killers out there, the world would be a much better place!

~

And if all this didn't make sense, please read the "butterfly story", it might help you see better.. It helped me.. :)

~

"From underneath the trees,

we watch the sky

Confusing stars for satellites

I never dreamed that you'd be mine

But here we are, we're here tonight

Singing Amen, I, I'm alive

Singing Amen, I, I'm alive

If everyone cared and nobody cried

If everyone loved and nobody lied

If everyone shared and swallowed their pride

Then we'd see the day when nobody died

And in the air the fireflies

Our only light in paradise

We'll show the world they were wrong

And teach them all to sing along

And as we lie beneath the stars

We realize how small we are

If they could love like you and me

Imagine what the world could be"

~ Nickelback ~

Friday, August 07, 2009

Our rides..

(picture's source)

~

~

I thought I can steer my wheels,

& that I could never change my reels..

Thought my speed was enough for me,

& happiness can't be more than climbing a tree..

I was fine with all my surrounding mazes,

places, races and all familiar & unfamiliar-faces..

I didn't think that whatever it is that's missing,

Would change this human-annoying-dissing..

~

~

But then, he took me in a ride,

to a faraway land where no one would collide..

Where all the colors change their names,

and kids play all new games..

And music is never too loud,

& never too low in sound..

And fears shrink through the way,

& love grows wherever it may lay..

And no one there ever goes stray;

for the love of God there, is shown in every way..

And he promised me with no end to our ride,

& together we'll always, always coincide..

And I promised him we'll only do what's right,

only 'cuz he's my light, & I'll be his delight <3

Sunday, August 02, 2009

when i becomes US <3

(picture's source)

~

With every passing wind and flying bird I find roads within myself that I’ve never taken before.. For the past couple of months I felt so lost and was so longing to something that I never knew the name to.. Longing to a feeling that I’ve never felt before.. Longing to a bliss that’d be too much for me to take.. Longing for a state so high that’s never been heard of.. And I slept.. I slept and dreamt.. And with those dreams my loneliness grew larger.. Larger than one can take.. You see when you live a life different than the one you’re dreaming of, your pains will grow louder, that your ears would hurt.. And that noise telling you to come down to earth and not to look up is so frightening.. However, I looked up and prayed.. And when praying, one might be unsure, but I was sure, not of me, but of Him, your Master & mine.. Your Giver.. The Most Giving.. The Highest of all.. I was, am and always will be sure of His nearness.. He’s so close, close that you might not feel the evil of your very self because of His Protection; a Protection that saves you from your own self..

And……… And…………… Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaand my prayers were answered! My prayers, MINE! Small li’l me! God Heard my prayers & Answered them.. And Gave me so much more than I’ve ever dreamt of.. Now I see everything around me with a smile that comes from the small happy heart of mine.. Ya Allah, it just feels so right.. It feels so good.. It feels fresh and new yet as familiar as the back of my own hands.. It’s too strong yet too smooth.. Too fast, yet stopped all my tick tacks.. It melted my heart and reshaped it into a bigger one carrying so much more dreams and wishes filled with overwhelming love that exceeds all limits known to man.. It gave me big fluffy wings and carried me to a place that no one has found yet.. A cozy place created just for me to fly through while being protected from all harm, God Be Willing.. I feel safe, found, seen, clear, complete, light, sheltered and loved.. Above all, I am so thankful, that it hurts inside.. T H A N K F U L to the power of infinity.. I wish I can share my emotions with all mankind.. I wish I can let everyone taste this.. I wish I’d give my heart out and let y’all know that when love is divided, it grows & never goes less..It’s multiplied.. If you just let yourself be.. Be what you gotta be while being satisfied with whatever comes your way.. And give.. Give with all your heart and you shall never lose.. You only lose when you look for what you don’t have.. Guys, we have so many things that we can’t see.. Our souls, hearts, minds & bodies should always serve a purpose that’s higher than all tangible things.. It’s the worst mistake ever looking “outside”, we should look “inside”, it’s a wonderland in here guys.. Like he said: “It’s like looking through that tiny needle’s hole” :) It’s so tiny, but then looking through it; you’d see so many things you never thought you’d see through this insignificant hole..

~

You are my wonderland..

Thank you for finding me..

And thanks for being the one..

B L E S S ~ Y O U R ~ H E A R T <3

~

"Since the moment I spotted you
Like walking 'round with little wings on my shoes
My stomach's filled with the butterflies
And it's alright
Bouncing round from cloud to cloud
I got the feelin' like I'm never gonna come down
If I said I didn't like it then you know I'd lied
Every time I try to talk to you
I get tongue-tied
Turns out, everything I say to you
Comes out wrong and never comes out right
So I'll say why don't you and I get together
And take on the world, be together forever
Heads we will and tails we'll try again
So I say why don't you and I hold each other, fly to the moon
And straight on to heaven
‘Cuz without you they're never gonna let me in"

~ Santana ~