Monday, April 30, 2007


Where to start? umm.. This photograph? Alright then.. I’m in love with her.. This li’l girl with the young soul whom I think is surly touched by an angel.. Okay, I gotta tell you something.. It’s not always that my folks get to like what I like or see what I see when it comes to photography.. But this!! My oh my! This sweetie pie broke all rules.. She’s right now on our desktop putting a smile on every one’s face :) Seriously! It’s maybe the beautiful sparkle in her eyes.. Or the innocent warm smile on her lips.. Or oh.. Her cheeky cheeks.. Can’t tell really.. Her simple natural hair.. Praise the Lord for this beauty.. Thank you very much Michael.. I think if I ever meet her, I won’t stop staring at her smile.. I will try to make her happy as long as I can.. And I think when she meets me, she won’t ask me what degree I’m holding.. Or how much my shoes cost.. Or how much I get paid at work.. Aha, now it’s getting to real world talk.. sara is getting her feet on the ground.. sara doesn’t want to.. But she has to..

Well well well.. first real life disgusting scenario.. I’m getting the groceries.. And this really loud family on the isle behind me meet their old friends.. “hello” “heeeeeeey” “good to meet you” “you too, how’s it going? “well, I got my masters degree, in engineering (from this university in the states or canada can't remember)..” “wow, way to go, that’s a blast” “aha thank you thank you..”.. And so goes the super duper superficial relationships.. I wonder why it wasn’t something like: “assalamu alaikum” “walaikum salam, how’s it going” “well great hamduAllah” “hey how’s your fajr prayer going? It’s been falling behind in time and getting too early, it’s a struggle, what do you guys do to catch up with it?” “well, we..”.. or you know, something a li’l higher than the limited low categories that people use in their heads & hearts nowadays to judge other "carbon life forms" as
Mohamed refers..

Second more real life disgusting scenario.. He’s playing the Qur’an radio channel in the car.. And driving.. And reciting half way wrong along with the recitor.. And while stopping at the traffic light, comes this almost naked woman on the side pavement talking on her cell phone.. Yeah I had to look.. It’s a weird human being with colors and a lotta skin showing.. So your eyes automatically look.. And then as soon as I figured out that she was an adult female doing all that I turned my head right away, while pitying her and feeling sorry for those who stare at her.. No don’t look at me! Wallahi I didn’t stare! I just had to see what was going on next to the car I'm in! The loud voice, colors hands in the air, loud laughs.. However back to the guy with the Qu’ran playing in his car.. He’s still staring at her.. WHILE HE WAS RECITING QUR’AN.. sara wanted to cry.. Tears kinda condensed.. But didn’t roll down..

Enough with the disgusting scenarios.. Real life scenarios.. I told you I didn’t want to put my feet on the ground.. It’s just that I had to..

Anyhow.. I started this training.. And left work for it.. I was called crazy.. And others disbelieved me.. "You're not getting paid for this training! You already worked and had a salary!".. However.. It's an assessment center training thingy.. It’s so educative & most importantly enlightening.. Seeing all different people.. With different reactions to being tested.. Man! What am I gonna do on the big test? THE ULTIMATE TEST! I always feel this heartbeat that always comforts me.. Ya Allah.. Oh Most Powerful.. Accept me.. And us all.. Amen.

How Mighty is Allah! Today, brother
maqsood enlightened me with a beautiful being in Allah’s creation.. The pigeons.. I learnt more about homing pigeons.. How Great ya Allah! Thinking of those pigeons.. I remember the first time my parents told me about them.. And how they delivered letters.. It’s amazing!

It’s nice to contemplate.. It supports you.. Strengthens your belief.. Your faith..
Leanne was talking to me about the bad stuff she’s been exposed to.. They say that seeing bad stuff tells the truth.. And that’s true Leanne..
"It was a tear, the song of its reflections;
I needed badly to hear it, badly to understand it
I was suddenly cold; the sadness of ashes
I cried not knowing, what wrong I had done.
Will I be able to say it, will you be able to hear it?
The rhythm of my sighs, the symphonies of silences;
As a melody that comes, and goes, and dances;
I cried thousand words, unhappy and tender.
~ by
Tariq Ramadan ~
Well, what can I say.. You can't have it all, can you?

As for those who promote the truth, and believe therein, they are the righteous. They will get everything they wish, at their Lord. Such is the reward for the righteous. GOD remits their sinful works, and rewards them generously for their good works."
Qur'an [39: 33-35]

I just wanna have truth.. Live truth.. Spread truth..
And be righteous..

Thank you blogger’s dashboard for taking all of this..
And thank you for reading..
"How about getting off of these antibiotics
How about stopping eating when I'm filled up
How about me not blaming you for everything
How about me enjoying the moment for once
How about how good it feels to finally forgive you
How about grieving it all one at a time
How about no longer being masochistic
How about remembering your divinity
How about unabashedly bawling your eyes out
How about not equating death with stopping
Thank you frailty
Thank you consequence
Thank you thank you silence"

Friday, April 20, 2007

Rise or drop?

"Tracing and placing
Giving one-dimensional boundary
to a multi-dimensional shape
From a form of existence
in this existence no more
Starkly the chalkline reveals
one fact from the case
Where the vessel wound up
in time and in space
Spirit released into limitless sky
Point no finger at me
I have an alibi"
"Chalk" ~ by I don't know who! ~
Rise Wise
````````Chalk Stalk
``````````````````Hand Stand
````````````````````````````Want Slant
``````````````````````````````````````Slump Drop

I don't know whether you'll get my blues or not.. But somehow, I do.. And it really made me view better.. With this, I can see clearly.. Just words! letters really! Anyhow, I'll leave you with my favorite part of the poem (written by I don't know who, who seem to be extremely inspiring):

"From a form of existence ----------> in this existence no more"

"Is plenty! Is enough!"

"A little bread -- a crust -- a crumb --
A little trust -- a demijohn --
Can keep the soul alive --
Not portly, mind! but breathing -- warm --
Conscious -- as old Napoleon,
The night before the Crown!
A modest lot -- A fame petite --
A brief Campaign of sting and sweet
Is plenty! Is enough!"
~ By Emily Dickinson ~
I really love you Emily.. I can always relate to you..
& I was born a hundred years after your death..
I've always felt that I've been in your room..
That I've sat on your very own chair..
& looked through your window..
I wonder where you are..

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Give him one logical reason..

Today, over here in the U.A.E., in Dubai precisely, a great theft took place.. “GREAT THEFT”! It’s sad.. And I have had a lot to say about that.. But after hearing brother BonsaiSky out, I felt that he said it all in a much better way.. And I think you should hear him out.. May Allah bless you brother BonsaiSky & assist you in all it is that you do for His cause.. Amen.


His Princess :)

Why Muslims Pray in Arabic -- By BonsaiSky

Monday, April 16, 2007

i’m it ;)

I’m it, AGAIN.. But this time tagged by nawara :) Dunno if it’s too late though :(

picture's source)

The Rule: “Each player of this game starts off with ten weird things or habits or little known facts about yourself. People who get tagged must write in a blog of their own ten weird things or habits or little known facts as well as state this rule clearly. At the end you must choose six people to be tagged and list their names. No tagbacks!”

So here goes:

1. Things affect me strongly.. ANY thing.. For example, bro coming home from school telling me that a boy (he doesn’t even know) from school fell and broke his arm.. I would worry for long.. And think of his family and everything.. Or sis constantly telling me of her classmate who has some mental difficulties causing him to fall behind in his academic progress (due to his heart being on the right side of his chest) & how the other guys make a fool out of him and always make him cry.. These stuff really affect me.. I could actually cry for people I don’t know.. And remember them every now and then!
The worst part about being affected fast is that, after being affected I stay affected! It takes a while (sometimes looooooong while) to get over that “being affected mood”!
2. I can’t NOT tell mama everything.. EVERYTHING!
3. I give written notes to people surrounding me all the time..They can find them in their bags, floor, wherever!
4. I spend any amount of money I have very very fast.. And I get relieved as soon as I spend it all.. Only not completely relieved as I can’t spend it no more ‘cuz it’s all spent! Spend it in what? Well, 2 main things.. No no, 3 actually.. a. Gifts. b. Perfumes & sprays (whether body sprays or room sprays) c. shoes..
5. I cry so fast.. SO WATCH OUT! So fast!
Last time cried: 5 hours ago..
Reason: She spoke to me in a harsh cold way..
6. I trust people so freaking fast & it’s so freaking scary..
7. I’m the biggest procrastinator I’ve ever met! Just let me explain.. I love finishing things, but don’t know how to! Really.. Maybe it’s that I don’t have faith in myself.. You know what? I think that’s really it! I don’t believe in my self enough that I could complete anything! I’ve never really completed things seriously on my own!
8. I forget all the time! I’M VERY FORGETFUL!
9. Sitting comfortably for me means sitting while keeping my feet in the same level I’m sitting on.. Like it’s very uncomfortable for me to sit on a chair, and just put my feet on the floor.. This means that my feet are on the ground and I’m sitting on a higher level.. It just feels like fighting the gravity.. I feel that the more we go up, the harder it is to fall down.. *BANG* Going down from a first floor, is way different than from the 10th I believe!
10. I always check what people wear in their feet!

And here, I’ll add an extra one for
nawara, as I know that I responded to your tag way too late ;) So here goes:
Smells DO matter to me.. I could smell everything.. And they affect me big time..

And world, this was li’l sara.. Who’s dying just like everybody else did.. Please do pray for her to make it through..

And oh (almost forgot), here are the six people I'm tagging..
You're it:
Lalla Mona
Um Nour

Saturday, April 14, 2007

Spinning, laughing, dancing

"Spinning, laughing, dancing
to her favorite song
A little girl with nothing wrong
Is all alone
Eyes wide open
Always hoping for the sun
And she'll sing her song to anyone
that comes along
Fragile as a leaf in autumn
Just fallin' to the ground
Without a sound
Crooked little smile on her face
Tells a tale of grace
That's all her own
Spinning, laughing, dancing to her favorite song
A little girl with nothing wrong
And she's all alone"
~ By Norah Jones ~

Evening of Inspiration :)

~~~~~~~~~THIS! :)

Tuesday, April 10, 2007


"Do good with all your ego. Say, "I need to make this happen." Say, "I have to see this complete." Not only is this 'I' permissible, it is critical to getting things done. So what is forbidden? To believe the 'I' belongs to you -- the 'I' in question, belongs to Allah (swt)"
We give so much effort pressing on the shift key to bring the i out looking like so: I.. Hope it's worth it.. Hope when this I goes back to it's owner, goes while being content.. Amen.

Monday, April 09, 2007

my first car accident :)

Did you ever see a horse bump into the other, by mistake?! Or a bird?! Or an ant?! Fish?! Yeah, well, us humans maybe!!


Okay my first car accident,

(picture's source)

I’m okay, not a scratch.. Praise the Lord.. Very slight bump.. But hey, you know what? We HAVE to have car insurance! I asked the policeman, and he said that it’s the law.. It’s a must.. Isn’t insurance haram?! And next thing, he tells me while smiling “wow, you’re religious”!! Come on! You don’t even know me.. Why do people judge so fast?! I do so at times.. But try not to.. However, the taxi driver was respectful..
Today marks the first day of sara calling a police station.. It was casual and smooth.. Nothing like the movies..

PS. Huda was over, and while talking, I tried to remember this word that means saying whatever is in your heart or mind.. But nothing! We even called friends.. It’s not honest, nor frank, blunt, outspoken, na na.. None of that.. I think it has M or something.. AAAAAAHHHH, can't remember!

Friday, April 06, 2007


“They say that women change

But you are ever constantIn your changefulness

Like that still thread

Of falling river

One from source to last embrace

In the still pool

Ever-renewed and ever-moving on

From first to last

From first to last

A myriad of water drops”

~By Mr. Randolph Henry Ash~

Well, I possess 21 solar years now! Actually on the 5th of April that was.. 21 solar years.. Even the day I was born in was an "israa and mi'raj" day.. But it has changed.. How many lunar years I wonder! I’ve definitely changed.. And through all the changes, I’m still ME! With the angels on my shoulders.. Counting it all.. But wooooooohooooooow! I changed! I look at my hand & it’s different.. I look at myself in people’s eyes & wow! They surely see me way differently than they used to..

“There are things that happen not spoken or written of.”
~ By I don’t know who.. ~

Yeah, I’ve learnt a lot.. Learned how to fax, but still wonder how it goes?! How even connection itself has changed over the years?! How khalo got my face to
be a part of an eatable piece of cake?! How we can love so much, & yet are capable of loving more?! How is it that as much as we learn, there is & always will be a lot more to catch up on?!

Bismika Allahuma amooto wa a’hya..
With Your Name, O Allah, I die and return to life

lotta fish in the sea!

Uh ah! I don't think so!
Is there really a fish like the other? Exactly like the other?

Monday, April 02, 2007

"A story? No, just an incident"

"One man's story cannot be compared to the story of life, if compared it might appear as just one simple incident, it can be the best of incidents if it results in giving benefit to someone, just supplying any other incident with what it takes to make it benefit other incidents, and so forth. So we are living incidents, or let's say instances of a life, smaller that the whole thing, bigger as we get closer to ourselves. Not much sense is made, but if you understand this, you can understand me."