Bro, if you’re reading this, please try to pull yourself together..
Well, it’s Mrs. K.. Mrs. K is this extremely devoted teacher.. A very warm woman.. She never taught me.. In the school I graduated from she taught.. She taught my brother & touched him in a way that no other teacher did.. When I was in high school, I remember her befriending me & giving me all those girly li’l advises secretly.. She’d always leave me with this peaceful feeling that I hardly felt with anyone else.. After graduation & through my college years, I used to see her in the mosque in Ramadan.. She’d always tell me what a special girl I am & how proud she is of me.. She used to tease her girls around by praising me & wishing they’d be like me someday..
When I myself started teaching, I used to remember her & wonder: “how can she teach all these classes with that warm smile that’s never left her?!”.. I never forgot her.. And after a year & a half, I got an offer to teach in MY OWN SCHOOL.. I met the headmistress in the mosque one night & she needed me to teach there desperately.. When my first teaching day started, I couldn’t believe myself, “how can I sit in the teachers’ room with all those professional teachers (half of them were MY OWN teachers) & correct notebooks & chit chat around them?”.. I was happy & scared.. And I hardly sat in that room.. I couldn’t.. I used to carry my notebooks & books around, of course with the help of my li’l angels & correct them in the staircase..
I taught in that school for only one month.. During that month, Mrs. K. used to call me & ask me to sit with her in that room & whisper all beautiful things to my ears.. A couple of days before leaving MY school, she wrote me this beautiful supplication & asked me to always recite it & keep her in my prayers.. I promised her that & took this li’l paper & stuck it on my bed & I read it every night before sleeping.. Ever since I left the school, she’d send me a message on my cell every now & then & by mistake send it to strangers & tell me how much she hates technology.. I remember once, she was sending me this du’a that she especially wrote for me & by mistake sent it to a man.. He called her & asked her who’s this sara you’re so much in love with.. She told him accept this du’a & pray for me :)
Just today, my friend called me & told me that she’s left this earthly life, after two weeks of testes & shocks of suddenly discovering this sickening cancer that has spread & weakened her whole body.. I hope that brief pain she had wiped off her sins.. And no, I won’t call this a loss.. She’s not a loss.. She’s living in hundreds & hundreds of beating hearts.. Mrs. K. is & will always be in my prayers.. I’ll never forget her hugs.. Her body was petite, but her hugs were very strong squeezes that’d get to your soul & nourish it with strong bright light..
Whoever may be reading this, please, please, please do remember these two souls & pray for them & ask Allah to grant them peace.. We never know what might happen to us, or to our beloved ones this very next instant..
How “daniyah” is this “dunya”,
And what a hard test it is to live it..
I might not be here tomorrow..
& never will I want me to fit in it..