Thursday, January 25, 2007

I don't chat to non-mahrams!!

“Guy+Girl Alone = Satan as their third”

Me & Myself

Me: Do you chat to guys (who are non-mahrams)?
Myself: Nope..
Me: Why?
Myself: ‘cuz we would be all alone & this would be a fitnah for myself if not for the guy.. Shaitan would be there..
Me: Do you reply to guys commenting on your blog?
Myself: Aha..
Me: So that’s chatting too!!
Myself: Well, I actually don’t see it that way; ‘cuz to me that’s a talk or a debate (u name it) in front of the whole world.. & then that would be up to me setting the limits or not..
Me: Do you reply to guys emailing you?
Myself: Aha.. According.. According to my intuition & sense of right or wrong!! WITH RESPECT..
Me: So you can chat with respect?!
Myself: I told you chatting would be all alone.. shaitan.. remember? Very slippery.. But replying would be under My supervision.. And mostly no replying takes place most of the time..
Me: You look like a hypocrite to me!!
Myself: Ya Allah.. That word freaks the hell out of me.. It’s a very big trap that anyone would fall into.. I ask you Allah everyday not to let me be one.. I remember the first encounter with this word happened when I was young.. Mama told me not to say something and be something else.. She told me a kafir is a kafir , a mu’min is a mu’min, but a hypocrite.. The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “The signs of a hypocrite are three: when he speaks he lies, when he promises he breaks it, and when entrusted with something he betrays it” (Bukhari, 1.15: 33. S). And Allah Most High says, “Woe to whoever demeans others behind their back or to their face” (Qur’an 104:1). And the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “Let there be no harming another, or harming him back. Whoever harms another Allah shall harm, and whoever gives trouble to another Allah shall give trouble to” (Hakim, 2.58. Hg). & daddy.. Oh, how he hated lying! MashaAllah..
Me: So how about work?!
Myself: Well, I’ve always made sure I’m on the right track.. I left a very attractive offer for the reason of having to deal with a lotta men.. & Allah replaced it with a better place but a lower salary :(.. Hamdulillah.. Remember? Whatsup 'me', too many questions today? You were always there!!

Me: Just a li'l shake!!
Myself: Keep 'em shakes coming.. One needs that every now & then..
Me: Will do inshaAllah..
Me & Myself:
Oh Allah please save me from the evil of myself & the evil of shaitan.. & guide me & all my brothers and sisters to the straight path.. Amen.

------------------------------------------------------------
PS. I'm not seeking any praise here.. & Allah is my witness.. Just reminding myself before others..

18 comments:

FATIMA said...

salam,
no praises. keep the beautiful posts coming! long as it comforts you:)

--
you know sis, when im asked by some very thoughtful males to add them on msn, i refuse to make it a permanent norm! I explain it to them, that it may not be about their flaws or anything..I make it clear to myself that I may not be safe! *period*
--
May all the best happen. Sara if you'll allow me to share this. I really check your blog sometimes before i sleep on my mobile connection:)I am glad we have thoughtful and creative muslims. Not saying that to disturb but to contribute. Bless u dear.

Fatima- UAE

sara said...

Jazaki Allahu khair for the beautiful words..
Wallahi you once in a blue moon get to hear nice words nowadays..
People tend to share all that is provocative and humiliating and when it comes to thanking or saying something nice, they get lazy..
Shukran.. jazakiallahu kharaljazaa.. And way to go with what you’re doing.. I too explain before blocking & deleting ‘em.. If it’s not for them, it’s for me.. I mean I’M HUMAN!! Flesh & blood!! Soul & Heart!!
Keep in touch Fatoom.. Luv you fy Allah.. :)
Ya Rabb yestorna faqwqa alard, tahta alard wa yawma alard.. Amen.
--

PS. We can meet sometime inshaAllah :)

sara said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9fka3Lu_pr0

mortalmuslim said...

Salamz
so truuuuuu!
alhudulillah!I am out of this msn-chattin-wid-guys-fitnah!
xxx
mortalmuslim

p.s tell u a nice site!
sisters.islamway.com just for women.....they have forums aswel!

sara said...

Tooooooo late!!
I've been a memeber since 2-3 years maybe!!
LOL..

Luv u sis :)
May Allah save us from all fitnahs.. 'cuz they look really nice from outside..
:(

Maqsood Qureshi said...

Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly:

It is clear from your question that you work in a place where there is mixing with men. Mixing leads to many evils and things that are forbidden, as is clear to anyone who has insight. Please see question no. 1200 for the evidence that mixing is haraam.

Trustworthy scholars have issued fatwas ruling that it is haraam to work in mixed environments, such as the statement in Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa’imah (12/156): Mixing between men and women in schools and elsewhere is a great evil which has a serious impact on one's religious commitment and worldly interests. It is not permissible for a woman to study or work in a place where there is mixing between men and women, and it is not permissible for her guardian to give her permission to do that. End quote.

Please see question no. 6666: Should she carry on working in a job where she mixes with men?

http://www.islam-qa.com

sara said...

Well.. JazakAllahu khairan for your support..
And that's exactly why I never worked in the field of my study.. (management).. Except once.. for 2 weeks..
I taught.. With women..
& right now, I'm not working.. Alhamdulillah..

fatima said...

depends on the mixed environment!


@ sara- why not sweets...id email u cz im way too far from AD. I FEEL we are alike in so many ways:)

bless u

sara said...

It depends..
It does.. It really does..
There are limits & red lines.. And everyone will be judged..
PERIOD

Irfan Paderwala said...

Well well well.........

am glad you have such wise understanding and make so much effort sista, the point you have made and just published, well i must say i really really respect, considering what girls and guys get upto these days.

after all you are an example to many young muslims,and a great lady like you will get rewarded for this.

These days women have lost their respect, by idiolising what men do. what do you think?

athere are barrierers, and limitations, and if you practice islam you will see the wisdom...

correct moi.

irfan

Irfan Paderwala said...

Well well well.........

am glad you have such wise understanding and make so much effort sista, the point you have made and just published, well i must say i really really respect, considering what girls and guys get upto these days.

after all you are an example to many young muslims,and a great lady like you will get rewarded for this.

These days women have lost their respect, by idiolising what men do. what do you think?

athere are barrierers, and limitations, and if you practice islam you will see the wisdom...

correct moi.

irfan

sara said...

"considering what girls and guys get upto these days."

Well, I believe our role models should be ummahat almumineen, sahabiyat, ladies of the prophet’s (peace & blessings be upon him) house.. These were THE ladies.. If I say 'oh I'm better than many others now', no progress will take place..

May Allah make us better mumineen every second.. Until we be worthy of His ferdous.. Amen.

Anonymous said...

I discovered your blog when i was just browsing and i would like to say that it is an amazing piece of work. I learn alot from what you put up and it helps me think about things more clearly. Inshallah Allah will reward you. If not in this lifetime then in the Hereafter. Take care of yourself and contiune posting your blogs, because im sure there are many other people like me that need others to teach them things. Salaams sister xx

Small Blue Thing said...

Didn't see this post before. Interesting!

I don't know if I'd say "Fitna"... But it's true that you can show yourself in a really odd way at chats. One of my younger friends was telling me a while ago how her ex-boyfriend was asking her to try again... And she was feeling bad. The guy in question is the perfect writer, and his intentions are good _but just they didn't fitted, and she cut the relationship after a couple of months a long ago.

So, she was sad, because she was in a bad mood, and his words were suggesting a different thing than reality had proved already once. Do you know what I mean?

Alhamdulillah the only guys I chat to are my youngEST pupils or my closest friends _and AN-CIENT friends of years, so there's no hesitation.

Nevertheless, Allah sent me a good friend by chat, but it was no chatting at all. "Augen" (my friend Steve) and I met in a forum of Middle Age Music lovers... he was 38 and I was 30 and almost-married. And Alhamdulillah he lives in Oregon! :P

We're still friends, we actually know each other and our famillies, but we're not "girl" and "gay" since long ago... Maybe that's why there was no harm in our meeting.

sara said...

Guess what?
I've been working with men now for the best month..
And I grew up in mixed schools.. And graduated from a mixed uni..
I'm just against the being alone part..

Love and give your kids forever dearest..

:)

sara said...

LOL I MEANT THE "PAST" MONTH NOT THE "BEST" MONTH..
LOL
:)

Anonymous said...

Huummm this is very intersting blogg i LOVE it i learned allot from it keep up may Allah keep us on Siratull mustaqeem.Ameen

sara said...

Thank you!

Amen :)